Relationships are like...

Relationships are like being marooned on an island without any food with a single pistol with a single shot:

• That pistol starts to look mighty friendly.
• Your best bet is to stand out in the sea until all manner of sea creatures become acclimated to your presence.
  
• You might be well served to make rope (out of human hair from your back, if necessary).

Relationships are like having sex with Magic Johnson:

• It seems great--until you get HIV.
• The innuendo never stops.

Relationships are like high school calculus:

• The crap just doesn't ever seem to add up right.
• I'm not good at it, but if I don't at least try my mom will be disappointed.

Relationships are like lies:

• They sound nice, but then you discover the truth.
• The little white ones are just as bad as the others.

Relationships are like table saws:

• It's never a good idea to get too comfortable around them.
  
• Grandpa made some awesome stuff with his; I cut my thumb off with mine.

Relationships are like salsa:

• My mom doesn't approve of the hot kind. (Yours doesn't, either.)
  
• The hotter it is going in, the hotter it is going out.
• If you're not careful it gets real messy real quick.

Relationships are like this blog:

• You know there's going to be one person who wants it to last a little longer, and another who already bailed.
• Terrible!